Office Tan: noun
1: a pasty and unattractive color imparted to the skin by lengthy exposure to crappy office lighting
2: a blog that documents the endlessly glamorous and exciting life of the office worker
Saturday, February 03, 2007
ALERT: Effective Coping Strategy
I know I slacked a little on my ingenious posts this week, but this week really kinda sucked. That's a bit dramatic, because there was nothing really wrong with it except for I was extremely busy, gawd fah-bid. So anyway, as I was busy whoa-as-me-ing I thought of some other creatures who have it WAAAAAAAAAYYY worse. For example, what if I were a bee? Bees have a really rediculous existence, courted for their vomit, they live in a weird flaky thing that hangs in a tree. The end of their life is often prompted by an out of control temper that compells them to poke someone which ultimately kills them. What about if I were a skunk? That's another unfortunate creature. Imagine if you had a juvenile deliquent's hair style at all times and your only conflict resolution strategy is to make other things stink. How about a roach? Everyone hates you and your entrance into a room is usually followed by frantic screams and often your last breath is taken while watching a Ked come down on your back (who wears Keds?). Being a turtle doesn't sound so hot either. Everyone seems to be obsessed with the fact that you're really slow and when you get scared your only recourse is to stick your head inside your weird permanent outfit. I think everyone's got the idea.
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What about if you were a blonde bouffant who had to clip-clop all over town in little teeny uncomfortable heels? That would be really lame. Oh wait, that's you. Sawree.
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