Monday, November 13, 2006

You should be ASHAMED of yourself!

A humbling realization was made yesterday: I'm inappropriate! Now, as we all know inappropriate is a relative term. The inappropriate I'm referring to is kind of like the grandmother's idea of inappropriate: pretty much anything you can think of that would be fun that doesn't involve producing something useful or worshipping the Lord. I've been inappropriate for as long as I can remember, thinking back to when I was just a wee Office Raider there was a particular event that started what has turned out to be a lifetime of inappropriateness to date. It was 1986 and little Office Raider with her budding penchant for music wanted to be Cyndi Lauper for Halloween. Office Raider's mom was quite crafty and made the young Office Raider the most wonderful Cyndi Lauper costume complete with the newspaper skirt and blue eye shadow. When Office Raider arrived to the kindergarten Halloween parade her mean, scary teacher thought the costume to be too suggestive for a 5 year old and was sent home. The rest of Halloween '86 was spent as a buttoned up pirate. Yes this is a true story.

Anyway, what spawned my dipping into the inappropriate archives was a friend request on myspace from my 14 year old cousin. I realized I couldn't accept her request due to the fact that numerous and possibly true conclusions could be drawn about me due to the content on my page. The last thing I need is my Dad to hear that any of the following could be potentially true:

1) Office Raider has a drinking problem: many of the comments left by my site's passerby's reference one time or another where my ability to walk, talk or remember something was impaired.
2) Office Raider fancies herself a sex symbol: For a brief moment I picked up a hobby that is now referred to as my stint as a "Non-Profit" model. This resulted in a collection of highly gratuitous images that now swivel in and out on a slide show on my myspace page.
3) Office Raider is maturing at a rate that is less than favorable: I'm on myspace in the first place!

Stay tuned on how Office Knight tried to save the day by explaining to the 14 year old cousin why we can't be "friends" on myspace. The response from my cousin is priceless and simultaneously raises concerns that her reading comprehension skills may be in need of some extra attention.

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